Warning: this entry is about issues of a girly nature.

Dear Uterus,

What the hell is wrong with you? We had a lovely schedule worked out, and suddenly you're being weird. Every three weeks? Isn't that a bit extreme? I'm going to run out of fabulously expensive self-adhesive heating pads soon.

I am not amused.

As I am bigger than you, I feel that I should be in control. Get back on schedule, or else.