My precious had a good day. However, my precious spent 3 times what she paid for [stuff] to send [stuff] to England. The post office is raping my precious's bank account. Or, more specifically, my precious Will's bank account.

Beth and I had a hysterical chat last night. I tried to tell Will about it, but it just doesn't translate. So, I'm not going to copy it here.

Um...monkey!