Tuesday, April 13, 2004


I'm covered in scars. Most of them aren't even visible unless the lighting is just right and I am pointing right at it saying, "There! Don't you see it?"

The most visible marks are from chicken pox, when I was nine. There's one next to my eyebrow, one on my tit, one on my belly, and probably a bunch more. I'm fairly certain there's one in my, ah, groin area, but I'd have to shave completely to find it, and I have no interest in having a naked hoo-ha.

I have two razor scars: one on my ankle from the second time I ever shaved my legs and one on my finger tip from a bad experience changing a blade, both at around age 12.

There should be a scar on my palm from the time that I hung my jacket on the top row of wrought iron hooks and my hand slid down onto the hook below it, but I can't identify it. My palms are covered with lines and I don't know what's natural and what's a scar. (It also happened when I was about 11, so it might just be gone.)

I have a scar on my knee from falling down while running and sliding several feet. To my credit, I kept running (I fell, slid and got up all in one motion - it was pretty cool), leapt over a bench, and tackled the boy I was chasing. I didn't even know I was injured until it was pointed out that my pants were ripped. It did that weird thing where it didn't start bleeding right away even though several layers of skin were lost to the pavement, and when it did start it was tiny pin-pricks of blood. I was about 15.

My arms are covered in marks. I suppose if you didn't know me and were unfamiliar with how different types of injuries heal/scar, you might think I was a self-injurer. I'm not, at least by conventional definition. The scars are all burns. Accidental burns. Some are from splattered cooking oil, but most of them are from ovens. I have a matching set on my right arm from oven racks biting me while I was checking food. They happened at totally separate times, and one of them is quite fresh, but they're nearly the exact same size and shape. There were a few occasions where I knicked myself with knives, but generally that doesn't happen. It's only heat that is my enemy in the kitchen. Most of those scars are from injuries as an adult.

I also have two belly-button scars. The first is my actual belly-button, so it doesn't count. The second is from the piercing I had there for seven years before I got sick of it getting infected constantly because those piercings never truly heal.

I think I'm going to go take a bath now and see if I can find any more scars.